Ok, so today was generally crummy. Not in any sort of profound way, but in the “I got a ticket on the way to work and the cop didn’t let me off easy” sort of way. It got worse from there. I was tired, all day, and we had a steady stream of cell-phoners all morning in the drive-through. Toward the end of my shift, I dropped a nearly full cup of hot (200* hot) water on the floor, so that it splashed up all over my legs. I don’t know if I swore or not. I started the word, but I’m pretty sure I caught myself. Obviously, the effect was the same, because my filthy heart overflowed through my tongue.
Since Dustin’s sermon on Sunday I have been increasingly marveling at the wonder of the Gospel. I had not realized how much I had slipped into a works mentality, at least functionally.
Today, I got a good dose of seeing my need for the Gospel.
I broke the law, and then I was irritated when I didn’t get away with it.
I was unpleasant, because my tiredness and “moving violation” affected my mood so much.
I ate too much.
I could go on, but I think I’ve made my point: I am a jacked up mess of a man, and I could not, on my best day, do God’s requirements. I read Mark 7 on my lunch break, and pondered these words of our Lord:
What comes out of a person is what defiles him. For from within, out of the heart of man, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, coveting, wickedness, deceit, sensuality, envy, slander, pride, foolishness. All these evil things come from within, and they defile a person. (7:20-23)
On days like today, I feel the glory of the Gospel, because I feel and see my own sin so clearly. I see the crap that comes out of my heart. I see that the only way I am even not crushed dead is because of Jesus’ blood and righteousness. I see that my own goodness is nothing — not goodness at all.
I see the greatness of the Gospel.
And I am grateful.